Issa Knife When You Can't Look Right Down The Barrel of the Camera

The Friday Post.

Cynthia Erivo, some SZA freckles, and Ariana Grande in the Wicked poster.

When I first saw the poster for Wicked, the first of a pair of movie adaptations of the Broadway musical, I thought Huh, kinda weird they almost did the Broadway poster but not really. In both posters, Glinda the Good Witch (Ariana Grande, originated by Kristin Chenoweth) whispers into the ear of Elphaba (green, Cynthia Erivo in the movie, originated by Idina Menzel in the show). For the Wicked Broadway poster, Elphaba is smirking mischievously, like you ain’t seen nothing yet. For the movie, Elphaba is kind of staring blankly and with a smirk that reminds me of a white woman about to ask for the manager at an airport Hudson News or that one Alec Baldwin plea to “consider the source.”

A few fan edits “fixed” the poster after it was unveiled, mimicking the show’s poster more clearly (red lips, hat covering Elphaba’s eyes). Would you be surprised to learn that she … was pissed? “The original poster is an ILLUSTRATION. I am a real-life human being, who chose to look right down the barrel of the camera to you, the viewer … because, without words we communicate with our eyes,” she wrote in a post to her IG story. Oh thank God — I was starting to think that the craziest quote of this movie’s press tour was Ariana saying that “when it’s a male actor that [changes their voice for a role], it’s acclaimed.” (I know Austin Butler is somewhere raising his eyebrows.) I used to pray for days like this.

“A real-life human being, who chose to look right down the barrel of the camera to you, the viewer.” I need to hear that in the voice of Daniel Day-Lewis as Daniel Plainview. “A real-life human being, who chose to look right down the barrel of the camera to you, the viewer.” Give it to me in the voice of Lydia Tar! “A real-life human being, who chose to look right down the barrel of the camera to you, the viewer.” Now do it as Miranda Priestly. What a quote, what a way to fuss! Actors should take their jobs seriously, of course, but not … like … this seriously. I mean girl! Be so for real right now.  This is the “wildest, most offensive” thing you’ve ever seen? What a charmed life! I need the Wicked press tour to go on for 100 years.

What the Paid List Got This Week:

Going to Coachella has never been part of God’s plan for my life … but headlining it should be part of his plan for Justin Bieber.

One Woman's Opinion: Justin Bieber Should Headline Coachella

In response to my post about Love Is Blind D.C. being worse than the January 6 insurrection:

I am listening. I am learning. Until then you can read the post here:

The LIB chats for the weddings and reunion will be paywalled. Consider upgrading your subscription if you want in.

More more more
A moving reflection on fandoms and Liam Payne’s death, written by Larisha Paul in Rolling Stone.

Were you at Whole Foods? Did you see this? I must know everything.

A remastered CD of Whitney Houston’s 1994 “Concert for a New South Africa (Durban)” is coming next month … the show will also play in theaters (Associated Press) … oh my God … I used to pray for times like this … Begging for the Brazil concert where she sang “Natural Woman,” and her 1991 HBO TV special Welcome Home Heroes, and of course that 3 second cover of “If Only You Knew.”

Mother Jane Fonda will receive the SAG Life Achievement Award at the ceremony in February. (AP)

Zach Braff, 49, has a new young girlfriend. She is a singer-songwriter and 26. (Daily Mail) Once again: you really have to see Zach Braff’s ugly Fuddruckers-ish home to believe it. 

That’s all this week. Thank you for reading. I must share the following information with you: Leonardo DiCaprio’s girlfriend has a sticker of Leo on the back of her phone. Have a good weekend!