Who Will Get Married on Love Is Blind DC? I Have Some Predictions

Kinda Taylor and Garrett versus everybody.

Spoiler alert for LIB7 below. Reminder: the Love Is Blind chat for the finale and the reunions will be for the paid list only. Upgrade your subscription if you want in :)

Garrett and Taylor on season 7 of Love Is Blind. Photo: Screenshot.

I’m not an overbearing-but-lovable mother of a sitcom everyman, so I’m not in the practice of advocating for anyone’s quick marriage. I am just a girl-slash-a feral watcher of Love Is Blind, the Netflix dating show that requires you to speed-date randoms and get engaged sight unseen. No one on this show needs to get married — and it’s up for debate if anyone ought to — but marriage is still this show’s desired outcome. That, and Vanessa Lachey demanding you get inseminated by the time the cast reunion tapes because she will ask you about it. 

Love Is Blind’s DC-and-the-surrounding-area era has been catastrophic. We are talking about a show with a couple too chaotic to even make it out of the pods on camera (Leo and Brittany, who left the pods and went to Miami where they called off their engagement). We are talking about a show with a man who cares just as much about Palestine (good) as he does about refusing condom sex (crazy). We are talking about a cheating scandal unearthed due to being drunk at a sleep test. Of the six couples that made it out of the pods, only three are still standing. It’s exceptional television.

Tomorrow morning the wedding episode drops. Who will make it to the altar, let alone say yes? I have some predictions for the couples still in the experiment.

Garrett and Taylor
Love Is Blind DC is a government psych-op sent by Meryl Streep in Jonathan Demme’s Manchurian Candidate remake to divide us.