One Nation Under Pap Walks

Bennifer’s, obviously.

My favorite thing about this is that most celebrities over 35 stopped being photographed ripping cigs in, like, 2010. Photo: Getty.

There are three people in every (and by “every” I mean “this”) relationship: Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck, and me (and by “me” I mean myself, literally, but also “us,” meaning everyone watching from home). Bennifer is, more than anything, uniquely attuned to this fact. How excellent they are at performing their love! No one else does vacations like them, does an IG reveal like them, does Venice like them, does pap walks like them, does the important grunt work of selling a movie like them. Lesser couples have to vie for our attention, begging us to care about their every little overshare; Bennifer simply is — and does — and it’s a thrill to watch them date. What new tricks does Lopez have up her plaid statement sleeve next!