amanda is too busy spitting in west-td's mouth in the south of italy or whatever but i would love an answer to 12. ciara is my girl and i'm sticking beside her (which includes watching tefi on aftersun; double nightmare for me) but if there is no ciara, i don't think amanda really did anything wrong. kyle is a loser, west is a loser; they are twin sisters. except west doesn't have anger issues where he explodes and lashes out (he just does quiet manipulations, moving in the shadows like the g in lasagna) and he is already in her inner circle personally and professionally so she didn't have to even think about...CLEARLY. but ciara DOES exist and i know there are a million tiktoks and tweets and reels etc about how she has been praying on ciara's downfall but i think it's actually worse because she really did love her so much. i just want to know what THE FUCK happened between august and january to completely shatter her sense of self, duty as a friend (as ciara pointed out, amanda barely has any as is), and just like completely lobotomised her. mia said it best. going from being married to kyle to being west's side chick IS crazy. did she switch weed strains? did kyle reveal a secret family in those therapy sessions? like #whatisgoingon !!! i know the answer is just selfish white woman july leo tings but ??? i just will never Understand
what i DO understand is: 16 & 24.
16: jesse is someone who identifies as he/honk because he is a clown. this whole Thing is the most serious i have ever seen him, probably because he is worried how him getting tom schwartz allegations was going to ruin the world tour. all 12 cities. carl, on the other hand, loves kyle more than (more) life itself and could not even call kyle out for getting the wife he never liked a cartier watch but refused to toss his bff a few stacks because he is "so broke". so yeah not shocked she never felt supported by the men. luke (now running for office btw) is the only man who loves yelling at women more than ben so no dice there, either
24: hunter, i love you so much and will spend the rest of our lives helping you see that the only toxic leo man born in august you need is ben affleck. kyle is such a loser and if he had just grown up and been even 5% less selfish, amanda could be happy in her house in new jersey with the dogs and their kids and kyle could still be a dj cheating on her as much as his little heart desires but instead i have to see a photoshoot of him in people magazine where he looks like mr beast. he probably still loves amanda but he never liked her (very much tom schwartz/katie maloney teas) and he still should be on his own apology tour. i still cannot imagine what he says behind closed doors because of the things he has no problem saying on camera especially after a drink (or his usual 10). but good luck to him booking those dj stages of which he speaks so fondly in a couple of years when the Poor Kyle wave finally dies out but i'm sure he will accidentally get some 19 year old pregnant soon enough and they can do a spinoff
i am so glad amanda and west did clownery because it has been truly tickling to hear your thoughts on my favourite show and the beautiful piece you did on ciara!!! andrew needs to stop "hosting" reunions because he never brings the same energy he does to them as he does on wwhl! i love how hubhouse has inserted herself into the west nile virus narrative and i did enjoy her licks on west at the reunion but hoping there is an aftermath to the aftermath special where you and the wirkus twins sit down with amanda and get some real answers for once
A verbally abusive relationship with an alcoholic leaves you very disoriented... you do not trust your judgment about reality or anyone's character, you do not trust the people around you (why did they not PHYSICALLY pull you out! Why are they still friendly with your ex, so wait, was the way he yelled at you actually ok?? Etc.. are thoughts in your head, however rational or not), you don't understand if you really are a piece of shit or not, unlovable, was all the verbal abuse correct? She is not thinking clearly. She just wants to not be yelled at by her boyfriend and to believe Kyle was wrong about what he's said over the years which is why west being nice to her (and she knows now it's not just bec he has to be nice to Kyle's wife for social reasons) and wanting her in a relationship capacity is irresistible. And probably believes all the verbal abuse on some level and so the reunion is just more people yelling at her that she's an embarrassing dumb bitch and speaking to her like she's an idiot, like yeah she's numb to that, it's normal home life for her for the past decade. I think that's where her head is at. Kyle being worried about her mental state and he put her there...there is a real darkness to that whole situation and it is so heartbreaking how Ciara trying to be a good friend to these broken people has led to them treating her with the same cruel carelessness with which they treat themselves.
thank you for saying this. i have always loved summer house for how Real it is but it's like tina fey said "authenticity is dangerous and expensive". it has been fun to have so many friends finally tune in this season but i have nor been able to properly enjoy because it has all felt so bone chilling. i Understand how and why the entire friend group is so angry with amanda but it is insane to me that anyone could have had floor seats to what went on between kyle and amanda and not see how desperately and delusionally she thought she could Fix her marriage. amanda's parents are together and deeply in love (much to my chagrin, as frank batula is my celebrity crush) and i have seen a lot of my friends with similar upbringings have prescription rose coloured glasses for their first serious relationship. watching amanda's illusion of her ability to do so completely shatter in the city is also devastating, knowing that she was so close to freedom and independence from kyle only to replace him with kyle2.0
it's all just so brutal. the same reason that makes the show so fun to watch is what makes it so equally devastating to watch currently. andy reiterating on wwhl how ciara should feel so good for being able to get everything off her chest like cussing out someone she loved so deeply and intimately for nearly a decade and the man who finally got his lick back on her after she had the audacity to care about him and call him out for being a douchelord. and you're totally right about the friends part and why amanda comes off so cold at the reunion. if she could feel anything right now why would she it be guilty to people who have been making jokes and merch and cheeky ads about what is the toughest time in her life
it's been hard to reconcile amanda being an actual victim and her being exactly where she wants to be and your comment has helped those final puzzle pieces click for me. it's why i will never understand why people look down on reality television because there is frivolousness but there is so much nuance and is such a fun house shaped mirror but has actually hubble level ability to reflect the society we currently live in back to us
And Ciara is holding Amanda to her own standard of emotional intelligence and maturity. She wouldn't do this to her worst enemy, and that is where so much of the hurt is coming from it seems like. I completely completely understand. But if a beaten dog bites you, you're going to be unsurprised. It might help Ciara heal if she views Amanda as where Amanda is at, and not as where Ciara is at. Ciara needs to guard herself, because emotionally immature people will take advantage of her with no understanding of reciprocation. Of course people flock to someone like Ciara and she has to protect herself even though the exact wonderful qualities that make her who she is make putting herself first very difficult to her. It feels wrong to do, but if you are with people that do not have the ability to see outside their own fraught experience, then they will take advantage of her whether they are aware they're doing so or not and will do so while GENUINELY loving her more than anyone else, like you said in your first comment, and also while being shocked that she's hurt AND blaming her for holding them to the same standards that they have benefited from from her. It's very childlike, but they are stunted! It is beyond frustrating and gives no closure and makes no sense to someone like Ciara. But once you realize not everyone has the emotional intelligence that you do and some people really never grow up, you can also realize that the gravity of their actions are truly not personal (as sad as that is in its own way!)
Yes to all of that. A relationship like that distorts everything. Also why people can't think clearly enough to leave abuse, either. The ground under you is shifting constantly so you have no idea what is safe and good and he also does love her and care for her in other ways. So you feel crazy and shut down all emotions because you don't trust your own, and it's how you make it not matter. If nothing matters the abuse was no big deal either. And blacking out, he probably doesn't remember a lot of the verbal abuse so she's been being gaslit for years and whether it's intentional or not, it affects you. She is so numb and if you don't come from an upbringing like hers it makes no sense that she stayed, and haven't experienced abuse you won't understand what it would have done to her state of mind and genuinely I am so happy for all of these people that can't comprehend how fucked her head is right now and probably will be for like another 2 years!! Damage is never an excuse to damage others and shame on her for not being aware to not hurt her friend. Ciara could not fix a husband sized wound and obviously west would look to Amanda like maybe he could... she owes so many people sincere regret and apology but not Kyle and she is probably incapable of that right now and for a while.
Damn these comments got serious on here. I think there is so much internalized misogyny happening. I too felt sickened and disgusted by Amanda’s behavior and I had to actually look at myself and wonder why I wasn’t as disgusted by West or Kyle who are objectively bad. I think I came to the conclusion that I expect this behavior from men but it’s terrifying watching a woman be taken down by the patriarchy in a way that looks like the woman is a willing participant…It’s our worst fears come true. And that knowledge comes out in anger…at the victim for being weak or not smart. I think Lindsay and Ciara are seeing this most clearly. They’re women who have been effed by men too and can’t help but pile on (because come on Amanda!!!! The betrayal to your girlfriends was monumental!!!) but at the same time are trying their best to throw her life lines with their words. (Ciara’s monologue on her own mother and being an independent and strong woman was one of them). But honestly Amanda was (is?) unfortunately too far gone to catch the life lines at this point. It’s anger-inducing and terrifying watching it play out so publicly on our screens. Yikes.
Yup. Amanda fell in the quicksand years ago it seems. Too bad. Also they are both objectively silly men which is why too I think it was easy for all of them to stay friends it's too much cognitive dissonance for these ridiculous silly men (clowns!) to be harmful for real but omg the psychic damage to all of these women over the past few years... how are Meija, Ciara, Amanda, any of them ever going to trust anyone ever again?? People looking you dead in the eye saying that they love you (and Amanda is obv guilty here of this too!!) while actively harming you/cheating/disrespecting you left and right and not seeing why that's bad... and now the guy that screams at his wife is the good guy because he can cry?? Very dire. All very lifelike though lol carry on carry on there's work to do and appearances to keep up
I didn't know what Summer House was until this all happened and while I am still not entirely au fait with the whole situation but I do know;
-I would genuinely rather insert three leaking D batteries straight up the ol' vaginal canal than date a white Complex writer, and consider it a fair trade. That's on them both.
- I think that woman was not expecting people to take Ciara's side the way they did. I was surprised people took her side and again, this was the first time I'd heard about it. It seems friendship is more valuable than dick in these troubling times of ours and a lot of people were let down that one that seemed authentic, maybe even aspirational, meant nothing. She is not a girl's girl.
-I'm so glad I got to know about Ciara, because she is so funny and charismatic. Her 'how is your skin so good' episode made me a fan. It sucks this happened to her but I hope it leads to better things.
I so wish they’d asked about the beach convo with Mia. I want to ask like, why was possible romance with a man more important to you than your friendships with everyone on this cast?
amanda is too busy spitting in west-td's mouth in the south of italy or whatever but i would love an answer to 12. ciara is my girl and i'm sticking beside her (which includes watching tefi on aftersun; double nightmare for me) but if there is no ciara, i don't think amanda really did anything wrong. kyle is a loser, west is a loser; they are twin sisters. except west doesn't have anger issues where he explodes and lashes out (he just does quiet manipulations, moving in the shadows like the g in lasagna) and he is already in her inner circle personally and professionally so she didn't have to even think about...CLEARLY. but ciara DOES exist and i know there are a million tiktoks and tweets and reels etc about how she has been praying on ciara's downfall but i think it's actually worse because she really did love her so much. i just want to know what THE FUCK happened between august and january to completely shatter her sense of self, duty as a friend (as ciara pointed out, amanda barely has any as is), and just like completely lobotomised her. mia said it best. going from being married to kyle to being west's side chick IS crazy. did she switch weed strains? did kyle reveal a secret family in those therapy sessions? like #whatisgoingon !!! i know the answer is just selfish white woman july leo tings but ??? i just will never Understand
what i DO understand is: 16 & 24.
16: jesse is someone who identifies as he/honk because he is a clown. this whole Thing is the most serious i have ever seen him, probably because he is worried how him getting tom schwartz allegations was going to ruin the world tour. all 12 cities. carl, on the other hand, loves kyle more than (more) life itself and could not even call kyle out for getting the wife he never liked a cartier watch but refused to toss his bff a few stacks because he is "so broke". so yeah not shocked she never felt supported by the men. luke (now running for office btw) is the only man who loves yelling at women more than ben so no dice there, either
24: hunter, i love you so much and will spend the rest of our lives helping you see that the only toxic leo man born in august you need is ben affleck. kyle is such a loser and if he had just grown up and been even 5% less selfish, amanda could be happy in her house in new jersey with the dogs and their kids and kyle could still be a dj cheating on her as much as his little heart desires but instead i have to see a photoshoot of him in people magazine where he looks like mr beast. he probably still loves amanda but he never liked her (very much tom schwartz/katie maloney teas) and he still should be on his own apology tour. i still cannot imagine what he says behind closed doors because of the things he has no problem saying on camera especially after a drink (or his usual 10). but good luck to him booking those dj stages of which he speaks so fondly in a couple of years when the Poor Kyle wave finally dies out but i'm sure he will accidentally get some 19 year old pregnant soon enough and they can do a spinoff
i am so glad amanda and west did clownery because it has been truly tickling to hear your thoughts on my favourite show and the beautiful piece you did on ciara!!! andrew needs to stop "hosting" reunions because he never brings the same energy he does to them as he does on wwhl! i love how hubhouse has inserted herself into the west nile virus narrative and i did enjoy her licks on west at the reunion but hoping there is an aftermath to the aftermath special where you and the wirkus twins sit down with amanda and get some real answers for once
listening and learning! i will sit and reflect on this “the only toxic leo man born in august you need is ben affleck”
ben and kyle are the same to me like i cannot stand them and think they are clowns beyond but i do love them. i can never resist a leo
This comment could be behind a $1,000 paywall tbh
i have incredible news for you actually: for so much less than that u can read her newsletter!! https://thewallstreetjordan.substack.com/p/peaks-and-valleys-june-2024-happy
"JESSE IS SOMEONE WHO IDENTIFIES AS A HE/HONK BECAUSE HE IS A CLOWN"
he/honk killed me
A verbally abusive relationship with an alcoholic leaves you very disoriented... you do not trust your judgment about reality or anyone's character, you do not trust the people around you (why did they not PHYSICALLY pull you out! Why are they still friendly with your ex, so wait, was the way he yelled at you actually ok?? Etc.. are thoughts in your head, however rational or not), you don't understand if you really are a piece of shit or not, unlovable, was all the verbal abuse correct? She is not thinking clearly. She just wants to not be yelled at by her boyfriend and to believe Kyle was wrong about what he's said over the years which is why west being nice to her (and she knows now it's not just bec he has to be nice to Kyle's wife for social reasons) and wanting her in a relationship capacity is irresistible. And probably believes all the verbal abuse on some level and so the reunion is just more people yelling at her that she's an embarrassing dumb bitch and speaking to her like she's an idiot, like yeah she's numb to that, it's normal home life for her for the past decade. I think that's where her head is at. Kyle being worried about her mental state and he put her there...there is a real darkness to that whole situation and it is so heartbreaking how Ciara trying to be a good friend to these broken people has led to them treating her with the same cruel carelessness with which they treat themselves.
thank you for saying this. i have always loved summer house for how Real it is but it's like tina fey said "authenticity is dangerous and expensive". it has been fun to have so many friends finally tune in this season but i have nor been able to properly enjoy because it has all felt so bone chilling. i Understand how and why the entire friend group is so angry with amanda but it is insane to me that anyone could have had floor seats to what went on between kyle and amanda and not see how desperately and delusionally she thought she could Fix her marriage. amanda's parents are together and deeply in love (much to my chagrin, as frank batula is my celebrity crush) and i have seen a lot of my friends with similar upbringings have prescription rose coloured glasses for their first serious relationship. watching amanda's illusion of her ability to do so completely shatter in the city is also devastating, knowing that she was so close to freedom and independence from kyle only to replace him with kyle2.0
it's all just so brutal. the same reason that makes the show so fun to watch is what makes it so equally devastating to watch currently. andy reiterating on wwhl how ciara should feel so good for being able to get everything off her chest like cussing out someone she loved so deeply and intimately for nearly a decade and the man who finally got his lick back on her after she had the audacity to care about him and call him out for being a douchelord. and you're totally right about the friends part and why amanda comes off so cold at the reunion. if she could feel anything right now why would she it be guilty to people who have been making jokes and merch and cheeky ads about what is the toughest time in her life
it's been hard to reconcile amanda being an actual victim and her being exactly where she wants to be and your comment has helped those final puzzle pieces click for me. it's why i will never understand why people look down on reality television because there is frivolousness but there is so much nuance and is such a fun house shaped mirror but has actually hubble level ability to reflect the society we currently live in back to us
Also... you can't be friends with your friend's abusive spouse, you just can't. Except here it's literally their job
And Ciara is holding Amanda to her own standard of emotional intelligence and maturity. She wouldn't do this to her worst enemy, and that is where so much of the hurt is coming from it seems like. I completely completely understand. But if a beaten dog bites you, you're going to be unsurprised. It might help Ciara heal if she views Amanda as where Amanda is at, and not as where Ciara is at. Ciara needs to guard herself, because emotionally immature people will take advantage of her with no understanding of reciprocation. Of course people flock to someone like Ciara and she has to protect herself even though the exact wonderful qualities that make her who she is make putting herself first very difficult to her. It feels wrong to do, but if you are with people that do not have the ability to see outside their own fraught experience, then they will take advantage of her whether they are aware they're doing so or not and will do so while GENUINELY loving her more than anyone else, like you said in your first comment, and also while being shocked that she's hurt AND blaming her for holding them to the same standards that they have benefited from from her. It's very childlike, but they are stunted! It is beyond frustrating and gives no closure and makes no sense to someone like Ciara. But once you realize not everyone has the emotional intelligence that you do and some people really never grow up, you can also realize that the gravity of their actions are truly not personal (as sad as that is in its own way!)
Yes to all of that. A relationship like that distorts everything. Also why people can't think clearly enough to leave abuse, either. The ground under you is shifting constantly so you have no idea what is safe and good and he also does love her and care for her in other ways. So you feel crazy and shut down all emotions because you don't trust your own, and it's how you make it not matter. If nothing matters the abuse was no big deal either. And blacking out, he probably doesn't remember a lot of the verbal abuse so she's been being gaslit for years and whether it's intentional or not, it affects you. She is so numb and if you don't come from an upbringing like hers it makes no sense that she stayed, and haven't experienced abuse you won't understand what it would have done to her state of mind and genuinely I am so happy for all of these people that can't comprehend how fucked her head is right now and probably will be for like another 2 years!! Damage is never an excuse to damage others and shame on her for not being aware to not hurt her friend. Ciara could not fix a husband sized wound and obviously west would look to Amanda like maybe he could... she owes so many people sincere regret and apology but not Kyle and she is probably incapable of that right now and for a while.
Damn these comments got serious on here. I think there is so much internalized misogyny happening. I too felt sickened and disgusted by Amanda’s behavior and I had to actually look at myself and wonder why I wasn’t as disgusted by West or Kyle who are objectively bad. I think I came to the conclusion that I expect this behavior from men but it’s terrifying watching a woman be taken down by the patriarchy in a way that looks like the woman is a willing participant…It’s our worst fears come true. And that knowledge comes out in anger…at the victim for being weak or not smart. I think Lindsay and Ciara are seeing this most clearly. They’re women who have been effed by men too and can’t help but pile on (because come on Amanda!!!! The betrayal to your girlfriends was monumental!!!) but at the same time are trying their best to throw her life lines with their words. (Ciara’s monologue on her own mother and being an independent and strong woman was one of them). But honestly Amanda was (is?) unfortunately too far gone to catch the life lines at this point. It’s anger-inducing and terrifying watching it play out so publicly on our screens. Yikes.
Yup. Amanda fell in the quicksand years ago it seems. Too bad. Also they are both objectively silly men which is why too I think it was easy for all of them to stay friends it's too much cognitive dissonance for these ridiculous silly men (clowns!) to be harmful for real but omg the psychic damage to all of these women over the past few years... how are Meija, Ciara, Amanda, any of them ever going to trust anyone ever again?? People looking you dead in the eye saying that they love you (and Amanda is obv guilty here of this too!!) while actively harming you/cheating/disrespecting you left and right and not seeing why that's bad... and now the guy that screams at his wife is the good guy because he can cry?? Very dire. All very lifelike though lol carry on carry on there's work to do and appearances to keep up
ok we need to tag Andy!! we need to hear “Hunter from nyc wants to know…”
need you and lindsay to sit down with her asap
no because this is CRAZY hunter "What makes West not good enough for Ciara but good enough for you?"
I need Hunter and a camera
I’m back. Don’t watch the show. Read every question with gusto. 🫡
What makes West not good enough for Ciara but good enough for you? 💀
I didn't know what Summer House was until this all happened and while I am still not entirely au fait with the whole situation but I do know;
-I would genuinely rather insert three leaking D batteries straight up the ol' vaginal canal than date a white Complex writer, and consider it a fair trade. That's on them both.
- I think that woman was not expecting people to take Ciara's side the way they did. I was surprised people took her side and again, this was the first time I'd heard about it. It seems friendship is more valuable than dick in these troubling times of ours and a lot of people were let down that one that seemed authentic, maybe even aspirational, meant nothing. She is not a girl's girl.
-I'm so glad I got to know about Ciara, because she is so funny and charismatic. Her 'how is your skin so good' episode made me a fan. It sucks this happened to her but I hope it leads to better things.
Need Hunter sitting Amanda down at the red table…
12 is CRAZY work
im shocked they didn’t bring up that beach conversation
I so wish they’d asked about the beach convo with Mia. I want to ask like, why was possible romance with a man more important to you than your friendships with everyone on this cast?
#12 🙂↕️