Stop Being January

The Friday Post.

I am never one to shy away from a controversial idea. I will not be silenced, the magnificent capacity of my imagination cannot be contained. I had a migraine this afternoon — a sign from the universe that I ignored. I’m sharing something with you today that I cannot keep silent about any longer: It should simply stop being January. This must all end.

You’d be hard-pressed to find something that hasn’t happened this month. The weapons formed against us all have been prospering all the time. Barack and Michelle Obama are facing divorce rumors that I believe. Justin and Hailey Bieber are facing divorce rumors that I don’t believe. There’s a Bruno Mars-Sexyy Red collab out now that makes me sex-negative. (And I’m a “Die With A Smile” defender!) People are revealing themselves every day to have been following the official president, vice president, and first lady accounts on Instagram — embarrassing, I wouldn’t admit it even if I had to fight to wrap my arms around one of those big poles i…