This is The Friday Post, Hung Up’s weekly roundup of celebrity mess and miscellanea. If you like this kind of thing, why not subscribe? If you have received this post twice that’s because I fucked up sending it the first time and I Apologize.mp3!
What’s the opposite of a flop era? Channing Tatum is currently living it. The actor/Zoe Kravitz stan (see below) is perhaps the only divorced man in Hollywood to not act so … Divorced Man. (I’m not talking about Kanye this week because I won’t let the devil steal my joy!) Tatum posted a selfie to his Twitter Friday afternoon. A picture is worth a thousand words, but this image only needs eight: “My vibe right now is just living life.”
Amidst rumors that Tatum is dating his Pussy Island director Zoe Kravitz, he has begun following not one, not two, but several Zoe Kravitz stan accounts on Instagram.
Entertainment Tonight says the pair are officially together: "Zoe and Channing are dating,” a source told the site. “It started out as a friendship and eventually turned to be more." (Kravitz and her ex-husband Karl Glusman’s divorce was finalized this week.) But I don’t need this confirmation — look at this photo of them running errands!
And this is not normal “running errands” — this is running errands upstate. Who goes upstate with someone they aren’t kissing? There’s not that many things to do in upstate New York. (There’s like Dia:Beacon, Storm King, seasonal allergies, skiing, ???) I like this couple, it’s a surprising development. She is way too cool for him, but then again, she’s too cool for us all. This one time — this one time — the swirl industrial complex has made a point.
This is the lead story this week because: it is summer and I am in Oklahoma and I simply have to get off my computer and go sit on the porch with my grandma.
What paying subscribers got this week
I said I would write about my new favorite Taylor Swift lyric and then I did not write about my new favorite Taylor Swift lyric and then yall demanded I write about my new favorite Taylor Swift lyric so here it is. And reminder that if you would like to subscribe but cannot afford it right now, please email me!
Hung Up’s official stance on divorce is, as you know, pro. But this thread is art and honestly I might hang it up!
“she pointing her finger at you all hard rapping Flo milli lyrics” is a sentence I will be thinking about for a long time.
Madeline Hill, who writes the newsletter Impersonal Foul, interviewed the writer behind the tweets and I recommend their Q&A.
Me’s Up for: The Spencer teaser
Luckily it dropped an hour before my therapy appointment — God shows up to show out!
Kristen Stewart only says two words in this trailer — “They don’t” — so I cannot issue a ruling on her British accent. For some reason I can’t stop thinking about Emma Can’t Act Watson watching this video and getting all worked up over it. A girl can dream!
And while we’re here:
I forgive Beyoncé for not releasing a Leo season yearbook. And Beyoncé has forgiven Sanaa Lathan for biting her:
I forgot to say this last Friday but: I am impressed that Jennifer Lawrence got a Beyoncé birthday shoutout. Good for her!
I really try to let this new generation of white girls rock; they can mind their business and I will mind mine (and Sharon Stone’s). But sometimes something so unfortunate comes across my desk and this week that thing is: Addison Rae mutilating “Teenage Dream.”
As a KatyCat let me say: baby you are not a firework.
Spike Lee Has Questions About 9/11
A lot of … points … are raised in this New York Times interview with my twin, Spike Lee. Chief among them is: are these transition lenses?
I mean … they are the same glasses, right?
But actually — seriously — this part:
According to the New York Times, Lee re-edited a portion of his HBO docuseries NYC Epicenters 9/11-2021½ that prominently featured a 9/11 conspiracy theorist.
Martin Scorsese Glasses Update
Martin Scorsese is still in my hometown of Tulsa, Oklahoma. Would you believe this mf — who I love unconditionally — is still not wearing his glasses?
I myself am on location in Tulsa this week visiting my family, and I hope to run into him and his glasses at the Stonehorse Cafe, the official dining room of dads who call shorts “short pants!”
Speaking of dads who call shorts “short pants,” my own father asked when he will make another appearance in my “Substack column.” I said he will earn a mention when he finally runs into Leonardo DiCaprio and can deliver a scene report to Hung Up’s loyal readers.
He considered this thoughtfully and said, “It will be easy to recognize him because have you noticed he’s got a big head? Very round.”
One of you horoscope girlies needs to tell me what to expect from a show debuting during October:
Not Queen Elizabeth on her Eduardo Saverin…
I hope the Tumblr user “lawyerupasshole” is enjoying a nice afternoon.
I was dragged this week
When I was simply trying to buy a pair of sandals on sale!
The September Issue
I profiled West Side Story star Rachel Zegler for Town & Country:
That’s all this week! Thank you for reading. This weekend I will continue adding and deleting the Zoe Kravitz blue dress from my cart on the Araks website.