Regarding Amy Adams Winning An Oscar for Playing Tree Paine

It will not be Jessica Chastain. It will not be Julianne Moore (but she can have everything else). It will not be Isla Fisher.¹ It will never be Debra Messing, though she has chained herself to the doors of the audition room and is threatening to sue if she’s not allowed to read for it. It will not be Emma Stone or Rachelle Lefevre or Kelly Reilly or Amanda Seyfried.² Sit down Bryce Dallas Howard! Rachel McAdams, you get the other one.³ There is only one working actress who, according to prophecy, will win an Oscar for playing that majestic email power-user, the elusive chanteuse, Taylor Swift’s publicist Tree Paine.⁴

“There’s a big online petition going around, a campaign for you to play Taylor Swift’s publicist, Tree Paine, in a biopic,” Jimmy Fallon told Amy Adams on Tuesday’s episode of The Tonight Show. “This is a tweet. This is from Hunter Harris,” he continued, reading “‘Amy Adams will win an Oscar for Tree Paine’s biopic.’”